New news

Okay, it was pointed out to me that it has been too long since I last posted, so here is some news. I go back to the ortho-pod on Tuesday. Who told me at the last appointment "Unless you seriously fuck up your foot between now and then, I will absolutly let you go back to the streets..." er...or something along those lines, he might have not dropped the F-bomb, so I was paraphrasing, whatever. So we are looking at the soon-est Tuesday night going back to work, unless I decide to get plastered again and fall down some more stairs. But I think the key to the whole thing was the heels, and since I won't be wearing them anytime soon, I think I'm safe. I survived the past Irish Holiday without an ER visit, so we can rule out the alcohol right? Anyways, I am looking forward to going back to my nights of reaking havoc upon the streets of my fair southern city. HQ is getting a bit...ah...tedious. My job right now is finding lost PCRs (patient care reports, for those who aren't medical) We went to electronic PCRs about three years ago. And medics are a fast thinking, but dyslexic group of people, so they like to transpose call numbers, addresses, times, dates and anything else. So in turn the programs we use loses reports. So I take a list of "Lost" reports which is about 100 calls (You do it by month) and find all the mixed up numbers and street names and fix them so the system can find them. It's like a giant game of Where's Waldo...and it blows. Except when you find one you have spent most of the day looking for. Which you then have 30 seconds of "I found it! I found it!" and then you just go to the next one on the list.

When I go back, I will also have to be Third Person for a couple of shifts. "Not because I'm a retard" as one of my supervisors put it. But because we have installed new AVLs, have a totally new radio set-up (we went to all digital radios about two months ago) and these new Stryker Stretchers that are electronic. Yes, you hit a button and it raises and lowers all on it's own. And the legs raise when you go to put the thing in the truck. And it works up to 700lbs (or 317 kgs). And they changed a few of the standing orders. So It's kinda llike easing me back into EMS. Then I will be on probation for and extra month or so and then I will be able to get my acting crew cheif.

So thats all my news for now.

Rules of a Night Shifter

So while I was sitting cubicle hell today, trying to fight off sleep and my ADD by reading the newest issue of JEMS (Journal of Emergency Medical Services) I can across an article by Steve Berry. For those who aren't familar with the man. He is the man behind the I am NOT and ambulance driver cartoons. (www.iamnotanambulancedriver.com) He also writes a column of JEMS. A humor column dealing with some of the lighter things in EMS...and they include the wonderfully twisted humor. This month's column actully caught my eye because he writes about the diffrence between Night shift medics and how we can be a little bit more...ah...rough around the edges. Mostly because we are sleep deprived weirdos who deal with more drunks, more psyhos, more violence than our daylight counterparts. EMS can be a difficult job, and even more when the sun goes down. We, as Steve puts it, "replace [our] pen- lights with the foot long MagLite, donning bullet-proof apparel, and matching garlic necklace, carrying Taser guns with silver-tipped prongs, recharging [our] iPods, and carrying a coffee mug so dee that it warrants a lifeguard when left unattended" He also explains how the attitude of the average EMS worker changes after about midnight. We may not be as sharp looking, sometimes fairly ragged, espaically if you catch us at the tail end of a 36 hour shift. As we know from my other post, I prefer the night. I am the only one in my circle of "medic friends" All the rest prefer working when the sun is out. I tried to explain it to them once, but it was futile. I think it has something to do with my mom being a night RN when she was pregnant with me, and when I was growing up, and when I started this job. It was the time I got the hang with my mom. Even now, if I work the city truck, we sometime go to the ER she works in and chill with them. The other people that work in the ED don;t mind because as long as we are with them, we aren;t out reeking havok and bringing them patients. And sometimes we even bring them donuts or bus-cuits from the 24 hour Hardee's down the skreet. So like like the night.
Steve Berry also mentions that everyone seems a little more laid back post midnight. oh...and he also has a list of rules that he states should be "posted on the ceiling of the ambulance, above the stretcher" They cracked me up, but are so true. Just ask any night medic so here...I will share...These are his words not mine...although I agree with every single one of them. (esp. rule number 2 and rule numbers 8, 9 and 10)
1. It's past midnight and I am not the same kindly medic I was at 8am, so be nice. I have big needles
2. I may need to examine you, but you..."no touchy" the medic
3. Alcohol may turn you into an idiot, but try not to be stupid
4.You are not Immortal. Beware: Ambulances used to be hearses
5.Don't force us to use retraints. We used to work in the rodeo
6. If you drank enough to require my services, it's not beneath your dignity to have me hand you a wastebasket to throw up
7.By law, you are not allowed to smoke in most public places. So what makes you think I am going to let you light up in an oxygen-enclosed closet on wheels
8. Arriving by ambulance to the ED won't necessarily get you faster service. Welcome to Managed Health Care.
9. If you think I'm tough, wait until you meat the ED triage nurse and hospital security guards
10. Maybe I wouldn't have to cut your clothes off if you had worn your seatbelt
11. Life's not fair. Get used to if. If it were there would not be 2 million lawyers in this town
12. Coming in by ambulance is not a "get out of jail free" card
13. To repeat: I am sorry, life is not fair. If it was, I wouldn't have to be here with you at this time and at this place. So, take responsiblity: Will this be cash or charge?
Taken from: "The Lighter Side: What They Don't Tell You in Medic School; When Darkness Falls by Steve Berry (JEMS, March 2007)

So To my fellow vampires...enjoy the night. Because everything looks to bright in the daylight.

Computers suck

Okay people, So My hard drive crapped out on me. Fuck. So it will be a while until I can post again. Just wanted to let yall know.
****EDIT****

I have been borrowing my sister's laptop. So maybe I spoke to soon. Anyways, the closest place I can get my computer worked on in Savannah, Georgia. You would think a city with an art school, and a libral arts college would have an Authorized Apple Dealer. But...noooo...I have to drive 2 hours away to get my computer looked at everytime it hiccups. Or makes a terrible, horrible, very bad screeching noise that I deduced came from the Hard Drive. So I called AIS computers in Savannah, who I have used before and they are wonderful people, and was told that "Yeah, your Hard Drive is about to kick it, and not in a good way, but run Disk Utility, you know, just in case" So after running the Disk Utility, it told me in big bold red letters "The volume Macintosh HD needs to be repaired" So I guess that means my computer is fucked. But at least it is just the hard drive and it will cost me approx. 220 bones to buy and install a new one. thats 120 for the drive and 100 for labor. I would do it myself, but the only downfall to being a card carrying menber of the Cult of Mac, is that Macs are incredibly hard to fix or upgrade hardware. They aren't quite as customizable after the fact as a PC. Still, not a big enough reason for me to switch. I've seen Vista, I watched it as it gave Mr. Gates the Blue Screen of Death during a keynote speech. So went Mac and never looked back (ha! I made a rhyme...I'm an idiot *sigh*) Now I must go and mourn the death of Mac. I'm wearing all black tomorrow.

EMS! Someone call for us?

So last night I went out with friends for drinks (no broken bones this time). Some EMSers and a couple not. One of the ones who wasn't in public service is acually trying to get on with a local Police department. It will be a good change for him, I think. But he is coming from a 9-5 desk job into a whole new world. So we (the EMSers) were telling him of stories. Some of the more strange things we run into. Now when I say what I'm about to say, It's not in a bad way, but I don't think he has any ideawhat it's like to do a job like EMS or Police work. Being a cop is more than running after people and shooting things. It, like EMS, has mnay diffrent layers for lack of a better word. As they were telling stories and telling him "you think that's twisted listen to this..." I was brought back to my first day as an EMT-B. Small things bothered me Like it really bothered me to just walk into someone's house without knocking. I was rasied in a very southern household where it was just polite to knock. That seemed very strange to me. I got over it very quickly, but I still feel kinda weird opening a door without first knocking. I have learned that it's okay to open the door slightly and yell "EMS! Someone call for us?" And then very quicklt get over what are you gonna see on the other side of the door. Are you gonna see a 80 year old with shortness...or are you gonna find a 400 lbs woman sitting on her sofa buck naked smoking a cigarrette yelling about the Queen of England living in her closet. You just never know.

And as always when one speaks of strange EMS calls the conversation always goes to one place. Things in Orfaces. Eggplants, tabasco sauce bottles, lightbulbs, straight pins, cotton balls, bic pens, you name it, somebody has shoved it up in a deep dark place for various reasons. And you never get a straight story. "I slipped and fell on it". But like any other job, you have to maintain some sort of composure and professionalism. I alway have the same running thought during calls like that ...It embarassing for them....Its embarrassing for them. And I think of something like naming all the Beatles albums in order or mundane things like the recipe for my bean salsa, as to keep me from losing it.

Then there are the heinous scenes, the MVAs with deaths or missing body parts, the homocides, the suicides, the dead baby calls. Too many of those, and one could lose thier mind if they don't know how to approach them. You just go to that happy place in your mind and do your job. You just have to think of it that way. It's my job. It's not easy, but this is what I have choosen to do with my life. You take the good and the funny with the awful and the twisted.
We all have way of dealing with the things that we see. Some go to the shooting range, some run or bike. Some turn to the bottle, whether it be alcohol or pills. I, myslef, shoot photographs or I paint. I go behind the camera and with every click of the shutter I let a little bit of all those fucked up emotions go away. But one thing should be the same for everyone. You need an escape from it. This job can kill a person if you let it. You have to grow a thick skin and an even thicker psyche.

Gerber Daisy Sepia I

Gerber Daisy Sepia I
Originally uploaded by artist in the ambulance 190.

Gerber Daisy VI

Gerber Daisy VI
Originally uploaded by artist in the ambulance 190.

Gerber Daisy sepia III

Gerber Daisy sepia III
Originally uploaded by artist in the ambulance 190.

My very good friend K. sent my flowers the other day. Gerber Daisies, which are my favorites. I was having a cruddy day. But she helped make it so much better. It was kinda funny, I had this big bunch of flowers on my desk all day. And everyone who asked who sent them my reply was "A friend" and why they would ask next " Just because"