Saturday, December 02, 2006

Harder than I thought

SO I have found life is difficult to sat the least when you are limited by having only one working foot and having to use crutches just to get around. Case in point...I have finally been given the okay to drive, which i sgreat. I was getting tired of being forced to stay in bed or on a sofa watching TV becauseI can't leave the house for lack of ride. was begining to really get to me. I was snapping at my family and generally not being very nice. I understand that, but was hard being stuck. But now I have Tallula back and took her out for a spin. Oh how I have missed her. Anyways back to the point. So I was heading to the local Harris Teeter to get my sushi from the regular sushi guy who I have not seen in almost a month. I could almost taste the spicy tuna. And my man make my roll fresh, just for me. while I get my Orangina and three granny smith apples. That has been lunch for months now. But intead of going in I sat in the parking lot wondering who the hell am I going to get the apples, sushi and orangina to the regester. I trully was perplexed. I really could not come up with a good way. If I was to put in in my bag I carry around for things just like this except priavtly in my own home, it looks as iff I am stealing. I could kick one of those baskets around, but that just seems stupid. I tried carring one, but it throws the balence off. So what did I do? I said fuck it all ans went to Mcdonalds got on of those apple and walnut fruit things and went home. Sushi-free. I will have to bring my mom with me next time so she can carry it. Unless you, my readers have anyideas? I am open for suggestion. I hate having to rely on others.

Its simple things like that, or getting up into my truck, or getting a cup of coffee from point A to point B. I hate asking for help. Im terrible at it. I always forget to say please and thank you. Its not because I'm ungrateful, its because I have never had to. Even when I hurt my back, i was able to move and be independant. But the stupid foot has left me 3/4 useless if you count the leg plus both arms because of the crutches.

I know I shouldn't bitch like this. I have had patients much worse than me. SOme are been left paralized, some have been left deformed, some have been left with nothing at all. I didn;t lose my limb, or ability to think or breath on my own. I spoke to the cyclist while I was in the hospital, who laughed at me, as he should have, and just in talking to him. I no longer felt sorry for my self. He had injuries that could have killed him. and damnit if he is not running triathlons now. So from this day on no more bitching. Only positive. I am healing, I will be back. back with the crackheads and drunks. back with the sick and the stupid. until then, I am done bitching.


Heather said...

As hard as it is, you may need to ask an employee for help. They are there to provide customer service, being on crutches it is truly obvious that you are not being a whiny-pansy-ass.

I recently traveled cross country with two little ones without my husband. After my third stop, I realized that I would have to let people help me, or I was going to lose my mind and become one of those screaming maniac parents that everyone tsk tsks about.

It's VERY hard; I'm a control freak, I understand.

Good luck.

PS If you are bored, Tuesday evening at 6pm the local blogging community is having a meet up at the Dog and Duck in Mt. Pleasant. It's totally casual. Directions can be found on the website.

Anonymous said...

I think asking for help is the best bet too. I know it's tough but most people like to help folks who have obvious, non-icky disabilities. Bite the bullet; it's only for a few more weeks.